Episode Transcript: S1E16: Welcome Every Feeling - Reflections on Rumi’s The Guesthouse

[00:03] Hello and welcome back to Read, Reflect, Rise. I’m Will Struthers-Cooper and I’m so glad

[00:10] you’re here. If you’re new, this is your weekly space to slow down, soften and reconnect.

[00:17] One soul nourishing excerpt at a time. In each episode I read a piece of writing from

[00:23] a great wellbeing thinker or poet. I guide you through a gentle reflection or meditative

[00:29] moment and I close with a powerful affirmation to carry you forward into the rest of your week.

[00:35] Today’s episode is short but do not let that fool you. It is deep, it’s about feelings,

[00:41] the ones we love to feel and the ones that we would rather run away from. You know those

[00:47] days when an emotion just blindsides you? You’re washing the dishes and suddenly your heart’s

[00:52] pounding, you’re sitting with your child and tears just bubble up or you’re dealing with day-to-day

[00:58] things and suddenly you are indescribably angry at the world. That’s what today’s

[01:04] excerpt speaks into with a lot of precision. We’re going to be exploring a timeless poem

[01:10] by the 13th century mystic and poet Remy. It’s a piece called The Guest House and this one’s for

[01:17] anyone who’s ever thought, why am I feeling this again? What’s wrong with me? Or I thought I was

[01:25] done with this emotion already or can I just get a minute of peace? You know those memories that

[01:33] pop up into our head unbidden and the associated feelings that go with them?

[01:38] We’re like what? This was done with, this is old news, I’m so past that. This is the key to dealing

[01:48] with those. All right folks let’s take that breath together and let’s go in.

[02:03] Remy was a 13th century Persian poet, scholar and a Sufi mystic whose work feels just as alive today

[02:09] as it did 1800 years ago. Remy’s poetry doesn’t speak to us here today, it speaks through all of

[02:16] us everywhere. He’s a master of the human condition. It doesn’t try to fix the pain that we all go

[02:23] through as humans but it invites us to meet it kindly and gently with heart and love.

[02:30] Remy believed in the sacredness of everything, the grief, the longing, the anger, the joy,

[02:36] all the feelings, all the sensations, every ache and awe was in Remy’s eyes a pathway.

[02:44] The guest house is one of his most quoted poems and for good reason. It doesn’t just offer comfort,

[02:51] it offers a radical reframe. What if our emotions weren’t obstacles? What if they were messengers

[02:58] sent to us with something to teach us and not enemies to escape? And what if the work of being

[03:06] human wasn’t about controlling what shows up but it was about how we greet it when it knocks?

[03:13] Let’s listen to the guest house now. I have time to read the entire thing because it’s much shorter.

[03:21] The guest house, translated by Coleman Barks. This being human is a guest house. Every morning

[03:31] a new arrival, a joy, a depression, a meanness. Some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected

[03:42] visitor. Welcome and entertain them all, even if they’re a crowd of sorrows who violently sweep

[03:52] your house empty of its furniture. Still treat each guest honorably. He may be clearing you out

[04:02] for some new delight. The dark thought, the shame, the malice.

[04:11] Meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.

[04:18] Be grateful for whoever comes because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.

[04:32] Moving straight into our meditation.

[04:41] I invite you to rest your feet flat on the floor.

[04:51] Take a breath in

[04:55] and release.

[04:56] Ah.

[05:02] Allow yourself to settle into your seat to notice the pressure

[05:10] of where you rest or stand. Perhaps you’re moving.

[05:15] Ah.

[05:25] Observe the contact that your body has with the earth that holds it up.

[05:34] Your feet are like foundations.

[05:39] You are solid and strong.

[05:45] Grounded and connected to your seat, to your feet, to the floor,

[05:54] to the ground, to the earth, to rock bed,

[06:04] to the entirety of the planet.

[06:10] You are a structure and you are strong. You are host to many amazing things.

[06:29] And this home, this body, it has visitors.

[06:39] Who is visiting you today?

[06:46] Is it joy, anger, contentment, fear,

[06:57] overwhelm, disconnection, or perhaps another word?

[07:08] Allow yourself to notice whatever feeling arises in your body.

[07:22] And as you do so, I want you to picture yourself extending a hand in welcome.

[07:40] Give your emotion some kind of body, some kind of energy or colour or shape or form.

[07:57] It is visiting you, whether you’ve invited it or not.

[08:04] The opportunity to slam the door has passed.

[08:08] So here you both are.

[08:12] This is your moment to choose what sort of host or hostess will you be.

[08:21] There’s a chair over in the corner.

[08:26] Why not guide your guest to it?

[08:35] And perhaps your imaginations can add some warmth or hospitality,

[08:44] something of comfort or something nourishing to this visiting emotion.

[08:51] And now I would like you to think of a time when you were irritated.

[08:58] Perhaps someone did or said something or perhaps a situation caused great frustration.

[09:08] Think back to that moment and think back to how you felt in that moment.

[09:20] And while you’re there, ding dong, here’s your frustration.

[09:26] Or your irritation come to visit.

[09:32] And have a look at them.

[09:34] Think about what kind of consistency and texture or feel they have for you.

[09:39] For everyone will feel differently.

[09:45] Give them a form, a shape, a colour, a light and energy.

[09:51] And when you feel ready, again, extend your hand, welcome them in.

[10:02] There’s a chair, spare, just next to that corner where you put your other emotion.

[10:13] Invite them in, offer them some comfort, offer them some hospitality.

[10:21] Perhaps even thank them for visiting.

[10:27] For in their existence, they have a purpose.

[10:34] It could be to notice injustice, to protect you or someone else.

[10:39] It could be the gift of telling you that you’ve had enough, it’s time to rest.

[10:45] Or it’s time to eat or time to hydrate or time to breathe.

[10:52] This irritation came with a message for you in that situation.

[10:57] It’s okay if it’s not obvious yet, not all guests get straight to the point.

[11:05] There’s your chair, please take a seat.

[11:13] And if you’re ready and it feels safe to do so, I’d like you to think of a time where you felt loss or sadness.

[11:27] Could be around a situation or a person.

[11:32] Could be anything, small or big, depending on how you feel at this moment.

[11:39] Pick something that’s a fit for now.

[11:46] Ding dong.

[11:49] Go up to that door.

[11:53] Welcome them in.

[11:57] Take deeper breaths if you need to.

[12:02] And only welcome them in as far as you feel comfortable.

[12:09] Maybe you’re standing on the foyer, maybe you’re looking at them over the threshold.

[12:16] Maybe you’ve invited them right in to soak in a bubble bath.

[12:23] This is your sadness.

[12:26] Give it a form, a shape, an identifier.

[12:36] For me, sadness is very watery, almost like a walking bubble of water like you see in a space station.

[12:47] And I know I need to be gentle, or that wateriness might pop and soak me and everyone around me in tears.

[13:01] Your sadness will take on the shape that’s relevant to you and your emotional landscape.

[13:10] This is a very special guest. I want you to be extra welcoming.

[13:19] Remembering to breathe.

[13:24] And bring this guest into your home if you can.

[13:31] Allow them an extra special seat.

[13:38] And I’d like you to offer them comfort and hospitality.

[13:44] Perhaps laying a hand on your heart in connection with this sadness.

[13:55] For this sadness has brought you a gift.

[14:01] Of connection, of love, of memory.

[14:12] And sometimes it brings another friend.

[14:19] Sometimes it brings a friend.

[14:19] Sometimes it brings pity.

[14:21] Sometimes it brings anger.

[14:23] Sometimes despair.

[14:26] If you have another friend on your doorstep, do feel free to go welcome them.

[14:32] Bring them in.

[14:35] Offer them comfort and hospitality.

[14:40] They may have a gift for you.

[14:54] And when it’s time, as host or hostess, you will step back and survey the room.

[15:01] This party of uninvited guests that you have welcomed, embraced, offered comfort and hospitality to.

[15:16] And you may like some more than others.

[15:21] Some may be wonderful to spend time with at different times.

[15:27] But they all brought you a gift.

[15:33] A thank you for hosting.

[15:39] And if you can, look around them with warmth.

[15:43] Perhaps even with a smile.

[15:45] Recognising that they all have a role to play.

[15:49] Just as we have a door.

[15:55] Have a home.

[15:58] Have a foundation.

[16:02] Are all part of this earth.

[16:05] And we are all visited by all of these emotions.

[16:15] And we can all welcome them in.

[16:18] When the time is right.

[16:24] Bringing your focus back to your feet.

[16:28] Moving your fingers and your hands.

[16:33] Perhaps placing your hands somewhere in your body to ground yourself and give a compassionate touch.

[16:44] Allowing yourself to focus again on your breath.

[16:49] Slowly opening your eyes and coming back to the room that you began in.

[16:58] You have journeyed deeply.

[17:02] You have journeyed deeply.

[17:05] And it may take a few moments to find your equilibrium again.

[17:09] Especially if you are the person who is always rushing and doesn’t have time to process or sit with emotions.

[17:19] If that sounds like you, and I think it is all of us sometimes.

[17:24] If that sounds like you today, I invite you to listen again.

[17:30] Maybe not right now.

[17:32] Maybe later today or tomorrow.

[17:37] Hold space for those feelings.

[17:39] Hold space for those emotions.

[17:43] I promise you, you will find gifts.

[17:47] In this poem, Rumi reminds us of something so so powerful.

[17:53] We don’t have to love every emotion.

[17:55] We don’t have to be ready for them.

[17:59] The only thing we are invited to do is welcome them.

[18:05] Welcome them with the tenderness we’d offer a tired guest.

[18:10] A tired child.

[18:12] Or an injured being.

[18:17] Welcome them because they are at our door.

[18:22] And when we stop resisting our feelings and emotions

[18:26] and we start listening to them

[18:29] that’s when we hold a space for something to shift.

[18:32] Fear can soften.

[18:35] Grief can remind us of the love we have.

[18:38] Anger can show us what we are trying to protect.

[18:43] So if you are in a season of your life

[18:45] where there is a hard emotion that keeps knocking

[18:49] and you keep knocking it back

[18:53] you are not broken.

[18:56] You are just human.

[18:59] And you have choices.

[19:02] And this

[19:04] this is the deep work that we are doing.

[19:11] And to help you rise

[19:14] to help you move forward

[19:17] here’s your affirmation

[19:19] I hope it, the poem, the meditation

[19:24] and your choices

[19:27] help you rise.

[19:31] I welcome every part of me that visits.

[19:36] I allow each emotion space to breathe.

[19:40] I am open to the learnings

[19:42] they give me.

[19:45] I welcome every part of me

[19:47] that visits

[19:48] I allow each emotion

[19:51] space to breathe.

[19:53] I am open to the learnings

[19:55] they give me.

[20:00] I welcome every part of me

[20:02] that visits.

[20:04] I allow each emotion

[20:05] space to breathe.

[20:07] I am open to the learnings

[20:09] gift me. You can whisper that, write it down, chant it, march to it, write it on a

[20:20] post-it note and leave it in some place that you know you will be when emotions

[20:24] tend to arise and let it land, let it land every time you need it to. Thank you

[20:37] for joining me today truly. If this episode resonated with you I’d really

[20:42] love it if you took a moment to follow, rate or share it with someone who might

[20:46] need this message too. You can also join my mailing list for free meditations,

[20:53] podcast extras and beautiful grounding practices that I only send subscribers.

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[21:07] Please remember there is magic, medicine and power in the words that we weave and

[21:12] wield. Choose carefully, let your words lift you up this week and be kind to

[21:19] what knocks at your door because at the end of the day it is all you and you are

[21:28] infinitely lovable.